Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
