I wanna bring you to show and tell
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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