Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
Someone stole a lamp last night.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Randomize
