p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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