ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
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