I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Randomize
