Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Randomize
