I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Randomize