Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
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I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
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The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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