JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
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