I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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