I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Randomize
