I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Randomize
