ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
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