I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Randomize