I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Randomize
