you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
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