It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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