you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
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