It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize