Just mADE A PArabola og urine
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize