absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
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