He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Randomize
