It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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