he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
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