well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Randomize