You work out of a Hotel?
im holly from the hills drunk
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
I love you.
Bad choice
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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