i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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