so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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