I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Two words: blizzard sex
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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