what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
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