Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
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