That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize