Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
