the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
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