Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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