Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
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My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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