I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
