My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
