1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Randomize
