I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Randomize