i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
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