if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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