hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
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