I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
