I wanna bring you to show and tell
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
