its not stalking. its research.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize