What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize
