like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Randomize
