Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
