im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
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