i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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